


The Boob AU

by OreoAmbitions



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Corporate Espionage, F/F, Fake Marriage
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-17
Updated: 2020-04-17
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:01:40
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23695873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OreoAmbitions/pseuds/OreoAmbitions
Summary: Kara is trying to do the right thing. The chivalrous thing. She never meant to wind up fake married to a spy.
Relationships: Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 21
Kudos: 236





	The Boob AU

There will come a time later, when Kara is standing on the roof of Spherical Industries with a gun to her head, when she will wonder how she ever got herself into such a mess. The rain will pour and the city will roar, oblivious, far below while Kara tries to piece it all together. And it will end as it began: with a pair of brilliant green eyes and a sad smile.

Kara spies her at the hotel bar and, if she’s being honest, the first thing she notices are the boobs. I mean, can you blame her? The cut of that dress is scandalous at best and the woman wearing it is a vision, truly. Kara, lingering in the doorway in her slacks and buttondown, tired and a little unkempt from a long day on her first field assignment as a junior reporter, almost forgets for a moment that she’s shy and awkward and Definitely Straight Thank You Very Much. She flashes her brightest smile almost before she realizes it and, to her surprise, the woman with the boobs looks up and smiles back.

The second thing Kara notices is the older gentleman leaning in across the bar, his hand lingering on that dress somewhere just north of inappropriate as he reasserts his position at the center of the boob woman’s attention. The journalist in Kara says: I wonder what their relationship to one another is. The Definitely Straight Thank You Very Much side of Kara says: I should go rescue her.

There will come a time when Kara curses the fact that she’s somehow inherited that trademark Danvers penchant for heroism and trouble, but this is not that time. This is the time when Kara strolls up, one hand in her pocket, heart pounding in her ears, to flash that million dollar smile one more time and adjust her glasses. She glances dismissively at Just North of Inappropriate as she inserts herself into the situation with all the grace of a bull in a china shop.

“Sorry I’m late,” she says brightly. “Just a little bit of traffic on the bridge. Shall we get a table?”

The plan, if you can really call it that, has just about formed in Kara’s mind by the time she finishes speaking. There are, she assumes, roughly two possible outcomes. Either the boob woman doesn’t need rescuing after all and Kara is about to suffer an incredibly humiliating encounter, or she does need rescuing and they can head to the hotel restaurant together where Kara can see her delivered safely to wherever it is she’d like to be. What actually happens is neither of those things.

“Darling,” the boob woman says, a sad smile on her lips. “I was just about to call. This is Jack, the gentleman I was telling you about. Jack, this is my wife…”

It is to Kara’s credit that she only hesitates for a moment. She did take an improv class for half a semester in undergrad; she’s about as well prepared for a curveball like this as anyone could reasonably expect. She extends her hand and says, “Kara. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.”

“Likewise,” Jack replies, his eyebrows high. “Forgive me; Lena didn’t mention you were coming.”

Lena slides an arm around Kara’s waist so casually that for one insane instant Kara wonders whether this woman has confused her for someone else. “You know how it is,” Lena is saying. “Work doesn’t always allow for travel; I didn’t want to get anyone’s hopes up.”

Travel. So Kara, Wife of the Woman with the Boobs, is not supposed to be from here.

Jack fixes Kara with a smile that never quite reaches his eyes. “I hope the flight wasn’t too difficult.”

“Somehow it always feels shorter than I expect,” Kara says, mind scrambling. Where is she supposed to have flown in from? Is this a test? Is there something she should know to say?

Jack chuckes. “Well, Metropolis to National City is a short trip compared to what you’re used to, I’m sure. If you’ll excuse me, I’ll just let them know we’ll be needing an extra place at the table.”

Lena is hissing as soon as he’s out of earshot. “It took you long enough, goddamnit. I called for backup an hour ago! I think he has the asset here, at the hotel. If we’re lucky we can- shit. Hope!”

And just like that Lena is all smiles and warmth but for her white knuckled grip on Kara’s hip. She waves to a woman lingering in the doorway and Kara finds herself tangled in pleasantries and small talk, playing the part as best she can.

Now the plan is: get out of this as soon as possible.

It becomes clear that ‘as soon as possible’ might be a while coming when Jack returns and the four of them are escorted not, as Kara had assumed, to the hotel restaurant, but into the elevator. Oh. They are dining at the private club on the top floor, and all at once Kara is conscious of the fact that her entire outfit is likely worth less than the average glass of wine here, that her hair is coming a little undone in the back, that she didn’t put makeup on this morning because she was hoping that seeming a little more like 'one of the guys’ might earn her a more favorable quote at the conference she was working this afternoon. This is trouble, and if Kara’s gut is right, it’s dangerous trouble at that.

The menu doesn’t list prices but Kara navigates the social waters by ordering just about whatever Lena does - although she kips the salad appetizer in favor of egg rolls - and fumbles through conversation by saying as little as possible until the conversation drifts to the Kaznian refugee crisis and Kara begins to shift uncomfortably in her seat.

“Well, you know as they say in Kaznia,” Jack is saying, “Without work, there is no desert.”

He says the phrase in Kaznian so smoothly that it would have passed by perhaps anyone but an actual Kaznian refugee without comment. But Kara has never been the best when it comes to holding her tongue and so she corrects him almost without thinking about it. “ _Bez prace nejsou kolace_. Without work there is no cake.”

Jack raises his eyebrows, but it’s Hope who comments, “Are you from Kaznia too? Is that how you two met?”

Kara is frozen, processing the implication that Lena may also be a Kaznian refugee, but Lena is already answering. “Our fathers knew one another, yes, but we actually met at a bar. It’s a terribly mundane story. There I was, enduring the cumbersome attentions of some ape, and she simply swooped in for the rescue. The rest is history.”

Kara almost laughs. “Really, it was love at first sight,” she says. “Coming to the rescue was the least I could do. Even if I did turn out to get rather more than I’d bargained for.”

Lena’s smile is sugar sweet as she leans over to press a warm kiss to Kara’s cheek. “I’m worth it,” she promises and, mercifully, she changes the subject.

They make it most of the way through dessert before the conversation finally turns to business.

“How long are you in town?” Jack asks. “Not just for the conference, I hope.”

Lena hums, noncommittal. “Maybe a few days longer. There are a few business meetings I’d like to take care of while we’re here.”

“Well I hope you’ll save one of those meetings for me. Spherical Industries has made a breakthrough, I’m sure you’ve heard, and while I’ve obligations to the board to hear a few proposals the real prize would be a partnership with L-Corp. We could do great things together, you and I.”

A number of thoughts cross Kara’s mind in quick succession.

The first: Jack’s tone is so overtly predatory, so intensely suggestive, that Kara is absolutely shocked that he would speak to Lena in such a way in front of her (supposed) wife or in front of his own spouse.

The second: If Lena works for L-Corp, Kara has gotten herself into the middle of something very complicated indeed.

The third: Jack is, as Kara has suspected for the better part of an hour now, not just some rando putting his hands on a woman in a bar. He is, in fact, none other than Jack Speer, as in Spherical Industries, as in the man responsible for the conference where Kara has been working. The conference where she was hoping to hear something that might confirm a rumored breakthrough to which Jack just openly admitted. And, if Kara’s sources are to be believed, Spherical Industries has gone to great length to keep the details of that breakthrough out of the hands of the authorities. Kara would give just about anything to find out why.

“You know I always have time for a few drinks with an old friend; I’m sure something can be arranged,” Lena says. “It really is lovely to catch up with you both. And isn’t your anniversary coming up soon?”

“One year on Sunday,” Hope replies.

“Well then an early congratulations to you both.”

When dessert has been consumed, coffee sipped, and the check paid (by Spherical Industries, at Jack’s insistence), it’s time for the long walk to the elevator and down the hall to what is presumably Lena’s room. Jack and Hope walk them all the way, and the small talk lasts another excruciating handful of minutes while Lena fiddles with her key until, at last, Hope suggests that everyone must be tired.

Kara’s mind is reeling. Jack and Hope aren’t walking away and so, in order to keep up appearances, she follows Lena into the hotel room.

It’s almost - almost - not a surprise when, as soon as the door shuts, Lena pulls a gun on Kara. There is still something a little inherently startling about finding herself on the wrong end of a firearm but, well, that’s been looking like the almost inevitable end result of this evening for a little while here and Kara figures the best thing she can do is handle it as calmly as possible.

“Who the fuck are you,” Lena demands, “and who the fuck do you work for?”

“I can ex-”

“You are definitely not the backup I called for. Are you with Edge? How did you find me?”

Kara raises her hands in the universal symbol for surrender. “I don’t work for anyone,” she explains. “Well, I work for CatCo, actually, but the point is, I think we might be on the same side.”

Slowly, her eyes never leaving Kara’s face, Lena lowers the gun and engages the safety. Kara’s gaze drops to the boobs. If there has ever been a time not to be distracted by boobs it’s this moment but, well. Kara may be Definitely Straight Thank You Very Much but even she can appreciate the absolute goddess standing in front of her in a sinful dress with a loaded weapon in hand. She swallows and forces her attention back to Lena’s face and to the knowing smirk that says her distraction has not gone unnoticed.

“I’m listening,” Lena says.

**Author's Note:**

> I had writer's block and my best plan was to write something slightly ridiculous and not try too hard. This is what came out. Just go with it.
> 
> The phrase Kara quotes is actually Czech. I was too lazy to insert the special characters; apologies to any Czech speakers.


End file.
